Emily's Story for His Glory

#Emilysstoryforhisglory

November 21,2023 (4 years since Emily’s accident)

I am slowly learning about this grief thing ...although not by choice.  The weird thing is I continue to wonder, and so do others, just how I am doing, and how my family is doing.  It’s not something someone ever prepares themself for or can ever anticipate how they will respond.  You are just there by whatever situation brings it on, and you have to muddle through it.  I don’t truly mean “muddle”, but it gets the point across.  As a Christian, I believe wholeheartedly that God is intimately involved in this grieving process 100% and helping, even coaching and carrying me through it … all the time. 

The analogy of a heavyweight boxer in a prize fight came to me as I have thought about this grief journey. I feel it’s similar in some ways...except that I have by surprise and unexpectedly been told I am now a prize fighter… in the ring right now, as of the accident, having never prepared or trained, but now thrown into the ring back on Nov 23, 2019 when I watched my daughter being wheeled into an elevator to have her organs donated to Gift of Life and realized  at that very moment, it was the last time I would see her this side of heaven. It was a huge blow that just about put me down, in fact, I wanted to go down… I was ready to throw in the towell.  But right then and there, with God’s help and the support of family and friends, I realized I had to get out there and put em up, guard my head, and stay in the ring.  And still, in the midst of the fight, consciously wondering how I am doing.  Fortunately, there are rounds, with a coach in my corner and a chance for a break and advice and inspiration.  I seek my coach often, usually about 7:30 in the morning, and I also have a lot of fans cheering  and encouraging me on.  Many of them have been in fights of their own and know what I should and should not be doing, and what to watch out for, especially when it comes to the opponents strengths and moves.  It has been so very helpful for my survival in this current fight to have this support and coaching and also to know I’m not in this alone.  There are family and friends who are also in their own fight, and we help and support each other. 

A lot of the time it feels like I am doing OK… and am going to make it … no matter how many rounds this fight lasts.  And other times, the pain of the constant hammering of thoughts and memories and especially those “anticipated re-occurring  days”, which for me are the 21st and 23rd of each November, March 13, her birthday, holidays, vacations, family gatherings and more, can really be rough.  And then there are the little personal things that only I can relate to.  Bags of almonds and york peppermint patties when I walk by them at the store still get me right in the gut (they were some of the things  I would buy for her).  Weirdly enough, every time I have to pluck eyebrows and ear hairs… well, that was her job, and it still gets me.  Also, I can hardly drive through rural intersections anymore without slowing down and looking both ways… and of course, just thinking back on the accident.   If I catch myself getting distracted while driving or hear of someone else doing it… I could possibly get on a soapbox and really go at the danger of distracted driving, and of course, think about the accident yet again.

Thinking back on Nov. 21, 2019 with a crying co-worker coming to get me off  a mower, telling me I need to get to the hospital ASAP and that Emily has been in a bad accident, and the 25 minute drive into the hospital as I literally cried out to the Lord.  These memories along with many others are permanently etched in my memories until I am able to see her again and painful memories will be no more. 

I find myself waiting for the sucker punch, or at least worried about it and wondering when it could come and what it might be.  Is something else going to happen that will put me over the edge?   Well, it has now been four years since the accident and I can thankfully say that God has indeed been with me this entire grief journey. In fact, in these past four years, there have been other situations that have added to the grief load. My dad, my mother-in-law, an uncle I was very close with… all joining the heavenly family.  All of these times and other stressful situations too, I have felt the presence of my coach.  He is a great coach and very concerned about our situations!  And He’s very capable and He’s always…. always in our corner!

I love you all… And many of you reading this are the very people and tools that God has chosen to use over the past four years and I thank you so very very much!

(This is a blog entry I started back in December 2019 that I never finished...  and added more on October 2020 and I accidentally discovered it and am now going to tack it on to the above post)

December 18, 2019

It has now been almost a month since Emily's accident on Nov. 21.  Driving on rural roads, probably running late for a work appointment at Jackson College, eating an apple and using a map app on her phone, she ran a stop sign going 58 mph and was hit by an oncoming pick-up truck that sent her, in her little Ford Focus, nearly 60 yards into a bean field.  The impact, even though from the passenger side of her vehicle, caused severe head trauma and bleeding of her brain,  among other non life-threatening injuries.  But, the head trauma was so severe that within 2 days, (Nov. 23) she was declared officially brain dead.  Life support continued, because although brain dead, the rest of her body was to be kept alive for a crowning end of her life here on this earth.   Organs and tissue were used by Gift of Life Michigan and that chapter of the story is yet to be fully known and written.  It is one we look forward to hearing about in coming days and months and maybe even years.  

But this we do know.  Our prayers for healing were not answered in quite the way we had hoped, but God's plans are higher than our own.  Emily's passing was no surprise to God.  He has used it already and will continue to use it into the future.  How, you may ask?  Let me tell you some of the ways God has already been working as a direct result of Emily's situation and story.
First, it called people to prayer.  Lots of people.  Social media and the internet really gets news out quickly.  Some may have thought our prayers were not answered.  But, who says they were not answered?  Maybe not like we may have hoped for, but if we are praying like we should be, we are praying for God's will, not our own.  He may not have healed Emily in the way we would have liked, but that is where we just have to trust Him.  I wish we had kept track of all the specific instances we have heard of that are a direct result of Emily's story so far.  People have come to know God for the first time as a result of this.  People have turned their lives around and decided to make life changes for the good, including a closer relationship with Jesus.  People have once again been forced to consider the briefness of this life on earth, and have been reminded this world is not our home, but merely a drop in the ocean of eternity... and then they evaluated or re-evaluated their own spiritual condition.  People have grown closer to each other as they have leaned on each other for support through this rough time.  People have mended relationships that were broken.  People have started to pray again, when they had given up on prayer.  People have started going to church again when they had given up on church.    And, people received new hope in life through the gift of organs and tissue.  And... I trust there will be many more.  I praise God for how he can take death or any bad thing, and bring about renewal on many levels, but ultimately renewed life and good...for His Glory!

Inwardly, as a dad losing my daughter, I am still reeling and trying to come to grips with the whole thing, as are Rene' and the boys and our extended family and close friends.   I know we have all had our moments.  As  Christians and believers in God's sovereignty, we all know without a shadow of a doubt that God has a plan... and somehow this was part of it.  We really do trust Him!  But, humanly, in our weaker moments... and all the while still trusting in God's sovereignty, we grieve.  We mourn the loss of a very special and beautiful daughter, an only sister, an outgoing grand daughter, a beautiful niece, a joyful cousin, a crazy co-worker,  a good friend, or an energetic and vibrant personality that brought life to those around her!  The reality of the situation comes in waves... and the finality of our relationship here on this earth with our beloved Emily is staggering.  I just plain and simply miss her immensely.  I don't know how else to say it.  And I feel it...physically.  I have an ache in my chest that I can't get rid of.
As I sit here thinking about everything that has happened in the last month, my head spins.  It has all happened so fast... and yet it has been a month.  I am seriously in a weird kind of time warp.   Maybe I'm still in shock... I don't know?   I've never been through something like this before.

October 2020

And that's as far as I got...  And as I look back on it now, I was definitely in shock.  Some say it is denial, but I was not really denying the facts, but rather feeling the effects of being deprived of a daughter. It has taken time to adjust, and there are those moments when you feel like it can't be real, but you know it is.   I am beginning to believe that as we have been told by those who have been there, we will never totally adjust, but will ALWAYS feel the loss.

#emilysstoryforhisglory

December 30, 2018 Godsent Buck!

This entire deer season has been a series of bad luck ventures.  I had already missed 4 deer with 3 different firearms and I was beginning to wonder if I had lost it...you know...lost my touch.  Well, I may have... I know I cannot hear deer coming through the woods anymore, due to serious hearing loss, and I tend to have more shaking from the adrenaline rush than I used to, and I also know that my confidence with my firearms is at an all-time low...BUT, I also know that my confidence in this crossbow has grown exponentially.  This is the first deer I have taken with a crossbow that was given to our Osborne clan from Uncle Paul Yarger, who donated it to all of us to use and have fun with. With nobody claiming it yet... I decided to get it into the woods.

So this adventure started at JFM (my church), in a conversation with my good friend, Billy Cryderman.  He convinced me that tonight, (Dec. 30, 2018), was going to be a good night to be in the woods, so I decided I was going to hunt (God Thing #1-Going out hunting in the first place...this late in the season) and we agreed to let each other know if anything developed.  So, when this happened, he was among the first to know...and was eventually part of the celebration party that followed.

Choosing a stand is always a tough decision, since Murphy's law is a very close and dear friend that I deal with often.  I chose a stand I had already missed 2 deer in previously this season (God Thing #2 - This is a stand I felt jinxed in and had definitely smelled the woods up and had a lot of bad luck here over the past 2 months or more)... but I figured my chances were the highest at this stand for seeing deer on any given night.  We have had good history from past years at this stand too, and very seldom do we get skunked. My largest buck so far came from this same stand back in 2010, and Zack got his first deer in this stand, and all of us have seen bucks at this stand...one of which is the biggest buck Zack has ever seen while in the woods, and numerous other encounters with deer.  So, this was the place to be.

It was just about sunset and I had not seen or heard a thing, except for a boatload of squirrels making a lot of noise in the crunchy frozen leaves around me.  Of course, every louder-than-usual crunchy sound had to be investigated to make sure it could not be deer.  It was all squirrels at the moment.

Ten minutes after sunset, I was fighting off a scratchy throat that was causing me to gag, then choke, then almost cry while trying not to cough.  I have been fighting this all season.  It got the best of me before I could get a cough drop from my pocket and all of a sudden, I am coughing into my sleeve to try and muffle the sound....while I am sure that every deer within 200 yards is running the other direction.  I almost got down from the stand and called it another bad experience in the woods....but decided to stick it out for another 20 minutes til dark. 

Four minutes later I hear crunching through the woods.... loud crunching.  Now, you need to know, Caleb was also in the woods tonight and hunting behind the house and behind where I was currently sitting, and he had told me that if he wasn't seeing anything, he might get up and still hunt into the wind....which would be directly my way.   So, knowing that, I thought for sure all this noise coming my way had to be Caleb...or maybe even a group of people taking a hike.  I seriously could not believe what I was seeing when it was a deer making all this noise and coming my way (God Thing #3-seeing any form of deer after all the noise I had just made coughing).  And like I said earlier, I don't hear deer coming through the woods anymore.... I have to SEE them... but I could not help but hear this deer coming from a long ways off (God Thing #4).

So, as soon as I realized this was a deer coming my way, I also caught site of a rack.  Oh man.... I immediately said thank you God, and ask that He would help me not mess this one up, like the other four I mentioned earlier.  I slowly pulled the crossbow up and got him in my sights and kept my eye out for an opening, since he was coming through some fairly thick brush and my shooting lane was not much of a lane at all, but was grown in quite a bit.  (yes, I need to do some serious trimming of my shooting lanes before next year).  But, he was heading the direction of  a shooting lane, so this is good... and at the same time I am seeing that he is definitely a shooter, as I am able to see the rack better as he clears the thick brush.  Yes, my adrenaline is kicking in pretty good right now, but one thing I make myself not do at this point is to study the rack... in fact, I will intentionally try not to look at the rack.

Just before he got to the shooting lane, I believe I must have instinctively let out a "baaahhh" to get him to stop, but in hindsight I actually did it about 2 or 3 steps too early, because he was not quite to the shooting lane (as you can see in the series of pictures I posted).  So as I am looking through the scope, I am seeing a somewhat clear shot at his vitals and he is stopped....and I decide to take the shot.  I pull the trigger....and nothing...my safety is still on.  (I quickly dog myself mentally, ..."Smith...you turkey butt...you did it again...you screwed up yet another opportunity...I cannot believe it").  So, I am now in a hurry to get a shot off, so I quickly release the safety which makes a very loud and pronounced "click", (I dog myself again), and now he is at full alert and looking straight at me.  I still have his boilermaker in my sights, and he has not yet bolted... so I squeeze the trigger again.

(Commercial)  Geiko or a Car Company

The way he jumped and then immediately ran in a stumbling and jerky manner that deer will do when they have been hit with an arrow, gave me a good feeling inside that I had not had in a while.  I knew he was hit...but then I found the doubt and questioning set in and I started wondering if the shot hit the vitals...or not.  Was the shot good enough to put him down or have I just created the beginnings of a long blood trailing?  Well, I needed to wait for at least a half hour before I got down from my stand to check things out, so I quickly and quietly re-cocked the cross bow, and got another bolt loaded.  I might be needing a second shot on this guy...but hey...there was also about 15 to 20 minutes of light left and I would love to fill another tag of my remaining two tags.   It could happen.........

But didn't.

I got down from my stand 10 minutes after dark and slowly prepared myself for tracking or blood trailing, all the time keeping my ears as attentive as possible to any movement or noise in the direction he had run.   I went up the shooting lane to where he had been standing and looked for blood and for my bolt.  I found neither after looking for 10 to 15 minutes.   I decided to slowly head the direction he had run and search for blood.  I did not have to go very far before I found some.  I have a picture of the first blood I found.  It made me cringe and I dogged myself again.  If you are a hunter, you will know that good blood trails should have "clean blood"...meaning just blood coming out of the wound, hopefully from the heart or lungs.  If you find blood looking like the picture below, you would think it is coming from somewhere in the back half of the deer, or the gut area, and it will have "stuff" in it...which can be from intestines and other organs in the gut section of the deer.   So, my first blood was not looking so good.  I sat there and reviewed the situation for a few minutes, trying to decide what to do.  Bad blood like what I was looking at usually meant it was time to leave the woods quietly and let the deer lay down and die without being spooked....and then you come back several hours later and resume the blood trailing.  I am telling you all of this to help you understand God Thing #5.  During my review of the situation, I decided that I needed some more food for thought, some more blood to compare with the drip I was looking at, and to see if it got any heavier.  I also remembered that the noise of his crashing through the woods after being hit had not gone on and on in the crunchy frozen leaves like I had heard when I had first seen him...so maybe he had not gone very far.  But, that could be a bad thing if the shot is not good.  That means he will get up and run again.  Anyway, you get the point.  I deliberated for a few minutes and finally decided to keep on looking and see what was on up the blood trail.

I am so glad I decided to keep on looking, because the blood trail increased quickly and also did not show signs of a gut shot.  I was not only hopeful, but was getting pretty excited. 

I didn't have to look very long or go very far.   30 or 40 yards on up the blood trail from where I had decided to keep looking was where I found him.   Finding a deer at the end of a blood trail is always so rewarding and fulfilling.  It doesn't get old.  I think some of my Indian blood and love for the outdoors and respect for the animal always comes out at this very point.  It's not outward and you can't hear it, but inwardly I  am always thanking God for the gift, the success, and I actually appreciate the animal for a few moments.  I have heard of other hunters who do the same thing which is why I love the last picture I have included below. 

This is where the story gets the most fun for me.  I took a selfie with the deer and sent it to my family announcing the news and saying, "Finally".    For some reason they could not believe it...but the picture was convincing, so they ask where I was.  5 minutes later I hear and see my family coming through the woods in a flashlight parade.  It was great!  I did not expect such excitement from them, but I guess it had been a while since I had harvested anything real exciting (8 years to be exact), so yea...I see why they were surprised...and excited. 

We proceeded to capture the moment with the retelling of the story and taking several pics.  Their excitement really made it special for me...and I really appreciate the fact that they were all home and able to be part of the celebration.  (I have included a few retro pics showing family photos from past celebrations)

I then immediately called my good friend Billy Cryderman to let him know how my evening had gone.  He didn't answer, so I left a message.   Unbeknownst to me, he already knew about it anyway.  Zack had immediately called Aaron Cryderman and let him know about it...and Aaron was already on his way out to see it (Thanks Aaron for your vicarious excitement too!)  Aaron must have told his Dad about it because he already knew, and then come to find out, Rene' invited them out for pizza to help celebrate along with us.  So, it became a party.  In hindsight, I regret not getting a picture with these special friends who helped make the evening so memorable....so, thanks so much to all 3 of you Cryderman's!  (FYI - if you check out my facebook picture album entitled "Outdoorsy Pics", you will see Billy and Aaron in there quite a few times.  Our family history has quite a few celebrations together over the years!)

Caleb stuck around to help me field dress the buck while the rest of my family took the shortcut through the woods back to their vehicle (ha...ha...)  I accidentally sent them on an "easier way back to the van" that got them lost in the woods for a while.  (so sorry family...)

The next day, Jerome Country Market got $80 from me to process the meat.  (I am really cheap when it comes to deer processing, and it kills me to pay that much).  I kept the rack, of course, but sent the rest of the head to the DNR for voluntary cooperation for CWD (Chronic Wasting Disease) testing.  It came back negative and also let me know that he was 2 and a half years old.

So, why do I believe this was a Godsent Buck.  Because of the number of "coincidences" that came together to allow such an experience to occur.  It was a total package of events that just left me feeling thankful, blessed, appreciative, relieved, excited, amazed, surprised, and in the end...just downright overwhelmed by it all.  To some, this would just be a series of lucky happenings that ended with a deer.  It was so much more than that.  Memories of the entire season, culminating in a beautiful evening in the woods, with family and friends that I will treasure for years to come. 

(You may ask....why do you write these hunting stories out?  Well, I want to preserve the experience, and try to capture the moments on some of these that are more exciting.  These are some great memories of times in the woods that I can tell my grandkids about someday and I guarantee if I don't write them down and try to capture some of my thoughts and emotions...I will not remember most of it.  So...that is why I write it all out.  Sorry to bore you with all the details...but, if you made it this far you must be a little bit like me and able to appreciate the details)

(Selfie pic I sent my family announcing the news....saying, "Finally")

First deer with a crossbow.... and the biggest rack for me thus far

(pic of my kids and I...like the old days...)

(pic of the heart...showing the broadhead hole)

(first blood drop)

(looking from the tree stand the next day, down the shooting lane.  the small orange dot is where I found the bolt (arrow), which shows the path of the arrow in the pictures below...through the brush and trees)

(zooming in)

(zooming in more)

(zooming in more)

(I drew in where the deer was standing)

A picture I have always admired

Family celebration - Nov 1998

Family celebration - 2000

Kids coming out to the woods - 2000

Family Celebration - 2006

Comfortably Numb

I will now digress.   After my last post speaking to our power "in Christ", I will address the other side of the coin...and I will begin by sighting the unintentional "wisdom" found in the lyrics of the classic drug song, from my younger days, Comfortably Numb, by Pink Floyd.  Here is the excerpt I am referring to:

Comfortably Numb (Waters) (Pink Floyd)

"Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
When I was a child 
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown, 
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb."

Even in their mixed-up way, I believe Pink Floyd struck a chord of unintentional wisdom and an insight into what can possibly happen to all of us.   If we are not careful,  we can get comfortable.   Comfortable with life, comfortable with our present state, comfortable with the status quo,  comfortable with just how much we, as Christians, will allow God into our lives and how much we will allow our ears to hear.   Then, before we know it...we become numb  to the point of hearing anything at all from God.  His lips move, but we can't hear what He's saying.  Numb to His direction, His leading, guiding, and His possibility of being able to use us at all.

I think it can happen to any of us, but I believe it quite possibly could be more prone to happening to those of us who do not daily give Him permission to...once again, take up residence in our being.   We allow Him to communicate with us to the point where we hear His lips telling us what He wants of us at any given moment on any given day.   To be at a place where we are obedient and disciplined enough to realize how quick we can become comfortable and numb again, if indeed we fail to spend that needed time and communicate with Him as often as we should.

Back to Pink Floyd's drug song.  They surprise us again with another nugget of truth and unintentional wisdom in the lyrics, "When I was a child...".    As a Christian, if we read the words, "when I was a child", most of us immediately think of the passage of scripture in 1 Corinthians 13:11, that reads, "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.  When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me."   The real truth of this passage of scripture is  encouraging us to be mature in Christ and our relationship to Him and not to become numb in our inability to hear his still small voice that allows us to grow in Him, to respond to His call, ...and for our relationship to mature to a point of hearing and then doing His will, whatever it may be.

As a child of God, he wants us to never get comfortable in our current state...to never become numb to the point of not being able to hear from Him, to be refreshed by Him, to be motivated by Him, and to let him fill us with his hope, his inspiration that can allow our dreams for a life in Christ to be fulfilled.

Once again, music can speak volumes, and as much as I would like to share Pink Floyd's music with you, I think I will stick with the positive note and share this one from Brandon Heath.

May God Bless,

Chuck

Don't Get Comfortable - Brandon Heath

IN CHRIST ALONE (Ephesians central theme)

I find myself, once again, back in Ephesians...and once again, reminded of how much I love this book of the Bible.  There is so much to glean from this one book of the Bible, that it reminds me of a Reader's Digest Condensed Version of the Bible itself.

Before I began reading Ephesians again, this time, I read the intro to the book of Ephesians, found in my "Promise Keeper Men's Study Bible".  The author of this intro helped me see how many times the words, "in Christ" were used in the book of Ephesians.   So, as I read,  I found myself intentionally looking for all these references to being "in Christ", or other forms of the same thing, such as "in Him", "in the Lord", "in the One he loves", "in the Lord Jesus", and "in his mighty power".

After reading the whole book of Ephesians, with this theme in mind, and looking for the references...it reinforced how important it really is for us, as Christians, to not try and live this life in our own power and by our own means.   It is truly only in Christ that we can ever be what God wants us to be, or do what God wants us to do.  It is ONLY through Him, and His power that we can do all things (through Christ who strengthens us) and gives us the ability to do whatever He might have us to do.
 
Otherwise, all our efforts are in vain, futile, non-productive, and a complete waste of time...a waste of our very life, amounting to nothing.

BUT, in Him, we are able to be the very hands and feet and voice of God Himself.   That is an amazing thought, if you actually take a minute to think about it.   God, the One and only God, maker of everything we know, author of life itself...can allow us to act, speak, do things on His behalf and for His purposes.  A mind boggling thought if you dwell on it.   But, the important point is the realization of the fact that we can ONLY do anything in His power...nothing of our own...except maybe allowing Him to use us, and asking Him to use us.

Well, I know this is not real deep, nor is it a new or unique thought.   What it is though, is a reminder to myself, and maybe to anybody else reading this, that as a Christian, I have to continue to realize my utmost dependence upon God, and come to Him daily and let Him know that my devotion to Him is for real, that my dependence upon Him is huge, and that without His presence in my life...I can do nothing of any true and lasting value.  But, as I seek Him daily, and as He extends His presence and power into my life, my work, my family, my efforts, my friendships, my communication with others, my interaction with anyone and everyone...Life becomes fulfilling, blessed, worth living, with purpose, and everything it should be.

I am often moved emotionally by reading the Bible...but, I am also often moved, maybe even more, by music that speaks for the Bible or from the Bible.  So, I share this same thought, in music.

In Christ Alone - Owl City youtube (Owl City)

In Christ Alone - youtube video (Phillips, Craig, and Dean)

May God Bless,  

Chuck

A Father's Day to Remember (which is why I blog in the first place...to remember such events)

For the last 2 or 3 years I have been keeping my eye out for a fishing boat.  I am really liking the idea of quiet, relaxing times on the water and am hoping to get good at frying fish, and hoping even more I can become a decent fisherman.  With these desires running through my head from time to time, I have had a hard time driving past fishing boats that are for sale along the road, but at the same time, most of the boats I have seen over the last few years have been out of my price range. So, about a month or so ago, I drove past another fishing boat that was for sale as I was on my way into Jackson.  I must have been in a hurry, so the first time I saw it, I just made a mental note to stop the next time I came by.
Well, the next time I came by, I was already past it before I even saw it or remembered it...and once again, must have been in a hurry to get wherever I was going...because once again, I did not stop, but hoped to stop and check it out on my return home from this very trip.  It did not happen.  I went home a different way after my running around town.
Finally, on a day when Emily, Caleb and I were all heading to one of Zack's last track meets, I told both of them I wanted to stop real quick and get the phone number off of this fishing boat I had passed twice and failed to get any information on.  So, we planned to stop.   As I approached the area I had seen it, I slowed down looking for it, and became a little confused because I could not find it, and finally realized it was not where it had been...and must have been sold already.  I was a bit bummed.  We kept driving and I decided it must not have been meant to be.
Unbeknownst to me, the boat had been sold two days earlier...and also unknown to me, Caleb is in the back seat of the van as I am searching for this boat...trying to keep a straight face and playing dumb.   He, Rene', and my father-in-law, Art had all been involved in purchasing the boat for me...for Father's Day, 2 days earlier...and they did not even know I had been wanting to look at it.
Skip ahead now to Father's Day (a month or so later)
We had decided to celebrate Father's Day on the Saturday before Father's Day this year, due to an anticipated crazy Sunday anyway, with the start of our first youth camp at Somerset Beach.  So, Rene' let me sleep in on that Saturday, and I woke up just in time to sit down to an awesome "new french toast recipe" breakfast she had prepared...and Zack had already taken my coffee order the second I woke up and said he was heading down to the A-frame to get it for me.   Now I should have known something was up here, because Zack never runs to get coffee for me, and is rarely as chipper and energetic as he was at that hour of the morning (except maybe Christmas)...but I had only been awake a couple minutes and was fairly brain dead, so I had no idea anything was brewing.
After the great breakfast, a couple gift bags came my way.  I opened the first and it was a gift certificate for permission to buy new work boots.  I was happy.  I needed new work boots.  The second was a bag containing Chips Ahoy Cookies, Pay Day candy bars, and a bag of suckers....along with a card.  I was very happy for the snacks.  I almost forgot to open the card, and was reminded not to forget to open it...so I did. On the front of the card was a guy lounging on the bow of a boat.  I immediately said, "Now that's what I want!"  I was speaking of wanting the lounging most at the moment, due to the summer schedule already taking a toll, and  didn't really even take note of the boat.  Then I opened the card and there was a little hand made note that I thought said, "Look Inside".  I jokingly closed my eyes and (Looked Inside)and dreamed of something tranquil, restful, a vacation.  I was quickly corrected, because the note said, "Look OUTSIDE".   I was quickly told to cover my eyes and was led by Caleb and Zack towards the front door and out onto the front porch.  I was told to keep my eyes closed and not to peek...which I did.  They continued to lead me down to the end of the porch until we got right to the very end, and side of the house.  They told me to open my eyes.  I did.  I saw trees, I saw the campground, and then I looked out into the backyard, and sitting next to the trampoline....was a fishing boat.  I quickly felt like I was in a dream and everything kinda went into la-la land where I didn't really know if this was real.  Thoughts were running through my head like...WHAT?  This is not a Father's Day present...this is like Christmas and Birthday combined on a year I had been exceptionally good...or something like that.  Like I said, I had only been awake for 15 minutes or so...and had not even finished 1 cup of coffee...so I am hardly even alive...and I am still thinking, .... this just might be a dream.
I soon realized it was real, and there was a big blue bow on the side of our new fishing boat, and my family had been pretty sneeky in keeping it a secret for over a month.  They had fun telling me all about their sneeky-ness, how Zack had already been up since 6:00 that morning going to pick the boat up over at my father-in-law's barn, how they had purchased it 2 days prior to my thinking it had been sold...and about the guy they bought the boat from.   Bottom line on that guy:   He wanted Caleb to be his son-in-law...and was ready to have his daughter marry him, right there on the spot...had she been there.  It seems they had struck up a conversation about their churches, their love for the Lord, etc...and this guy just cut right to the chase.   He told Caleb he felt kinda funny doing this, and he had never done it before, but then ask Caleb if he wanted to come into the house and see a picture of his daughter.  I still don't know how Caleb made his way out of there...but somehow he did...and I don't think he is married yet.
I really like the boat...but I love my family a whole lot more and their efforts to pull off this Father's Day surprise were truly appreciated.  I immediately realized this was a gift the whole family could appreciate.  The boys could hardly wait to get the boat in the water.  Rene' can hardly wait to eat some fish.  And Emily can hardly wait to read my latest blog post about what an awesome family I have!  I am blessed!   Thank you family!  (and thanks Emily for taking the pictures to capture the moment!)

This was the Father's Day card I talked about

My Flag Flies Upside Down

Flying a flag upside down is a symbol of distress. I believe our country is indeed in distress in many ways and have strayed far from what God would have it to be...and what's worse, many of us are just sitting around and watching it happen. In fact, I think many of us don't really know what to do...so, we end up doing nothing. Sure, I may vote in the election for the candidate of my choice, try to live an upright and moral life, go to church every Sunday, and occasionally even speak out, for or against certain activities, people, causes or otherwise. But, even though these are good, what positive change has occurred in our nation as a result of these actions? So, what is it that needs to happen? What is it that we are all waiting for to bring about the needed changes? I believe it is a leader to rally around. Someone that lives an upright and moral life and is an example of the type of changes needed in our country, and someone determined to see those changes occur...no matter what! Conviction and determination, no matter what...even it would mean the end of his career or even his own life. If you need an example of the type of conviction I am talking about and want to watch a good movie at the same time, find a copy of the movie, "Amazing Grace" and watch it. It is the story of William Wilberforce, whose passion and perseverance changed the world. I am looking for a modern-day William Wilberforce to change the current state of our nation.
So, in the meantime, I choose to fly my flag upside down as a symbol of my own desire to see a better day, a brighter day, and as a symbol of my hope for seeing a brighter tomorrow for our country!!!

Here is a link for the movie if you want to check it out:
http://christianity.about.com/od/christianmovies/fr/amazinggrace.htm

or buy it:
http://www.amazon.com/Amazing-Grace-Ioan-Gruffudd/dp/B000VNMMQG

Too Much - 2012 - Savanna, IL & Mississippi Palisades State Park

For those of you who know me well, you know that I get away every 2 years with 4 guys I grew up with in Greenville.  We call ourselves, the "Too Much Club" (the name goes back to our high school buddie, Carl Brauteseth, who would always say, "You guys are too much!"...so, in his honor, we called ourselves, just that.)  Nevertheless, we have been getting away and meeting every two years since the early 1980's.  This year we met at a very central location for all of us, in NW Illinois, Savanna, IL, which is right on the Mississippi River.  We always try to focus on some form of getting out into nature and finding some form of outdoor activity or recreation.  This may have developed as a result of our high school years of taking Youth Group trips to Giant City State Park, Fox Ridge State Park and Pere Marquette State Park, which were annual camp-outs...so I guess we owe it all to our youth minister, Harold Neely and his love for camping as a form of ministry.  (Harold was also responsible for teaching us the game of Tripoley, which was always a New Year's Eve traditional game we played).  

Nevertheless, after that historical preface, this year we found a rental cabin that overlooked the Mississippi river and was just a couple miles away from Mississippi Palisades State Park.  We had not been to this area before, but knew we wanted to be in the area because it was so central for all of us.  (3 coming from Greenville, one from Minneapolis, MN and me from southern Michigan).  The dabin was indeed scenic and had a great view of the Mississippi river and we could just look out the front window and watch barges coming down the river.  The state park was close and we went there several times to enjoy the hiking and cliffs this park is known for.  (Greg had offered to bring rappelling ropes and gear, and it would have been a perfect place is we had taken him up on the offer).  It also had some nice grassy areas where we could play bocce ball and frisbee golf, and the weather on this particular weekend was perfect.

Tripoley, if you are not familiar with the game, is a card game that includes aspects of Poker, bidding on poker hands, using poker chips on a board and winning the chips for poker hands, and playing certain cards and collecting chips as you are able to play these cards.  We start this game on Thursday night and end on Saturday night...storing the playing board and chips somewhere out of the way during the day and resuming play in the evenings.  I believe Brent won this year...and I was the loser.  

All in all, a good time was had by all.  By the time we recreate, eat and watch videos for 2 and a half days, we are all ready to get back to our families, and we decided that is a good thing.   We have made a lot of memories over the years, and I always count on these guys to help me remember them...and help create new ones.